Sunday, 14 March 2010

On Not Having a Clue

"I'll have another mojito please Bovary"
"Coming right up Chatterley."

I woke up this morning covered in mud. My head was throbbing and I appear to have bruised my rib. A morning of toilet hugging began.

I'm no stranger to hangovers, but this one's a bit of a brute. What makes it worse is that I remember very little. Most of the night is a complete blank. In the few episodes I do recall I'm sitting on the sofa, making pleasant small talk with one of N's friends. However, it's unlikely that I continued in this vein for the rest of the night - in fact I know I didn't. I know this because I woke up to three texts telling me how 'awesome', 'on form' and 'sweaty' I was. These aren't adjectives you'd use to describe my usual, softly-spoken, 'I'm going to chat in the kitchen' party persona, so I imagine I was making a massive arse out of myself. N explained why I was covered in mud - in the 20 second walk from a cab to his front door I managed to fall in a ditch. This could also explain the rib. The Jack Daniels is accountable for the headache and toilet-hugging.

It's a horribly uncomfortable feeling this - I have absolutely no idea what I was doing and I know that in a few hours the photos will start appearing on Facebook. I'll have to wait until then to find out what level of foolishness my behaviour reached, and swiftly detag.


  1. Serves you right! Where were you? I really recognise that chair. Mary Janes near Aldgate?


  2. Haha! That's weird. The photo is from Mary Jane's, but taken on Wednesday. I was at a house party on Saturday, but wanted a booze-themed photo.

    You obviously know your chairs!

  3. someone recognizes the chair? you may be more VIP than you realize...or now you know who you should hang out with more.

    yes we have a table, at least someone of our friend circle is there most every night. Often we are a group larger than 5 so that means we only have 2 tables to choose from, and we like the front one. Bonus - we also have the server's mobile number...

    I've never seen Cheers - but I did go there when I was in Boston in like '98.